David Rhoden

I tried to strangle my roommate while sleepwalking.

by David Rhoden. Day .

I hadn't been living in the dorm (Morrill Hall) that long. I had a nice roommate named Richard. He had a cute and sweet girlfriend. She would sleep over, which was very much against UT law, but she was very quiet, it didn't bother me. Richard didn't bother me much. At least I didn't think so. He did have one quirk.

He had hopes of becoming a sports announcer. So when I was doing my homework, he was doing his: he would call ball games on TV with the sound down.

He did it really quietly. But I could hear him.

"The pitcher's windin' up now...and here's the pitch. The batter takes it, for a ball. Catcher throws it back to the mound. Here comes another pitch. It's another ball."

I couldn't concentrate but he was trying so hard to hide it from me it seemed mean to tell him I could hear his whispered commentary. It was just a college thing.

Unitl one night. I was sleeping, but I heard Richard calling out to me, in a strange, strangled voice, like a cartoon character who was in trouble.

"David, David!"

Then I heard the girlfriend also calling out my name.

Why would they be calling me? I didn't know, but then I woke up.

I was in bed with them, straddling them, with my hands around Richard's throat, my thumbs crushing his windpipe, thus the choked-sounding voice.

They looked very worried. I let go, said "...sorry", and went back to bed.



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